Calm Mornings for Busy Mums
How mums can reap the positive effect of a morning routine without cookie-cutter routines that don't fit into the life of a busy dedicated mum.
I used to cringe if someone told me about the importance of a good morning routine.
When I first heard about the book “The 5 am club” by Robin Sharma I had to laugh.
Fun fact: The world-famous author is a Mauritian (that’s where I live) citizen and he comes here regularly and apparently was working on this very book while he was on the island.
Whereas I know mums who jump right out of bed, go to meditate and do their yoga session, the majority of mums struggle.
I would say, “I’m in the 5 am club” because my eldest would wake up at 5 am for several years (I feel blessed now as he now sleeps till 6 am).
The numerous benefits of having a morning routine made sense. My logical brain would affirm, I should try it. As I’m always curious to try out new things, I decided to get up before the kids woke but 4.30 am is just an inhumane time to get out of bed.
Sod it, I’m not doing this….
But hearing over and over how a morning routine benefits you psychologically and physically, I continued to experiment. I still wanted to be able to reap the positive effect of a morning routine on my well-being but realised those cookie-cutter routines don’t fit into the life of a busy dedicated mum.
Before I share what I found works for me, let me share
Why a morning routine is important
1. Your morning sets the tone for the day
How you spend the morning makes the difference between a productive or a sluggish day.
2. Boost Your Productivity
When you take some time in the morning and intentionally focus on something valuable, you’ll find that you’re able to focus more throughout the rest of the day and are more likely to finish tasks.
3. Feel in Control
Mums juggle a million plates. With all these commitments, we often just rush from one task to the next. The day starts to control you, rather than the other way around. Taking an intentional moment in the morning to look at the day ahead; to prioritise and evaluate what really matters could be a step toward helping you regain control.
4. Better Manage Stress
Mums know that kids like predictability. Kids like routines because they know what to expect, what to do and what’s the next step. The same applies to us grownups. A morning routine relieves you of the worry about what needs to be done next.
I probably don’t need to tell you, when you are less stressed, you are more able to stay calm and in control when your kids decide not to follow their wonderful routines.
5. Develop Healthy Habits
It’s tempting to jump right into the to-does of the day. Get cracking with the laundry, meal prep, errands etc. And while it’s important to get these things done, it’s also important to develop healthy habits like intentionality, mindfulness, exercising, planning and prioritising self-care.
Such healthy habits will carry over into the rest of your life.
6. Regain Your Energy
Instead of dragging yourself out of bed, downing your coffee and tackling your to-do list with this constant sense of urgency, starting your day in a positive mood and with a powerful feeling of productivity can increase your energy.
If you want an extra energy boost, include a high-intensity workout, meditation, or a cold shower in your morning routine.
7. Improve Relationships
I already mentioned that morning routine have a positive impact on your stress levels. It is common to take out stress on a loved one. When you reduce stress, you’re less likely to snap at your kids and partner.
When you pause in the monring to plan and prioritise, you’re better organised and have more opportunities to create pockets of time to spend with your family, which is critical for improving relationships.
8. Foster Confidence
When you’re calm and collected, you naturally feel more confident. When you feel less rushed and more in control of your day and feel productive, it’s good for your self-esteem.
It feels good when you can take the time to do your hair, choose your clothes and get ready.
That’s the WHY… Now let’s get into the HOW…
How do you create a morning routine that works for you?
I promised I’d share what I discovered works for me. Here it goes… I start my ‘real’ morning routine later in the day, once the kids are out of the house. My big one leaves for school at 7.30 am, I drop the little one at kindergarten at 8.30 am. After drop off my morning routine begins. I stop at the beach for either a nice 20 min walk or just a 5 min gratitude visit where I put my feet in the water, take a few deep breaths and marvel at the beautiful view.
When I’m back home, I make a nice cup of coffee, go to my office, place my mobile face down on my shelf and open the window wide and sit down at my desk. The night before I placed my journal (click to grab a complimentary copy of my Magical Morning Reflections for Busy Mums) with my pen on my desk. This might seem like a small insignificant detail but it’s actually a great tip to make a habit stick. Finding my journal there first thing reminds me of my practice, it makes it easy for me to actually do it and it makes it harder to just skip and straight away open my laptop to dive into work.
Remember, an effective morning routine depends on you making it a habit and sticking to it.
Let me share some tips that make it easier to develop a desire to drive your positive habits.
You need three elements:
Cue + Routine + Reward = HABIT LOOP
(Want to learn more about habits? Book recommendation: Atomic Habits by James Clear)
What is a cue?
A cue is a trigger that evokes a certain action. My favorite cue to make sure I stick to doing my morning reflections is to set my desk the night before. Tidy up my work surface and place my journal with a pen.
What is a routine?
A routine is a certain behavior, action or ritual that becomes a habit by performing it repeatedly and consistently.
For me, it’s beach, coffee, office…
What is a reward?
A reward is a satisfying feeling that your body gets every time you perform a certain action. This sends a signal to your brain: “This feels good. You should do this more often!”
When I’m done with journalling in my Magic Morning Reflections for Busy Mums, I feel grounded and focused. I already feel a sense of accomplishment and it’s just about 9.30 am! I’m ready to tackle my day and I’m much more productive compared to frantically rushing home after drop-off, downing my coffee, and reading emails at the same time – that’s what I used to do.
This is what’s called a Habit Loop.
You want to create your morning routine, you set yourself up for success (cue). The act of engaging in your cue triggers your body to perform a routine (journaling). The feeling of groundedness you get afterward is the reward you get. And a healthy ‘addiction’ is born.
After a while of following your morning routine, you will continue to crave your reward, and this way you have taught yourself a new habit! Go you!
